As promised--a photo of my pregnant self. I will say at this point that I don't usually look this pregnant. It really depends on what I'm wearing, and that sweater makes me look enormous! I really haven't gained that much weight, and I can still fit into all but one pair of my jeans. We took this photo for comedic value, as I am barefoot, pregnant, and in the kitchen!

Maggot's first picture! I've been told it looks like he has a full head of curly hair. It's kind of hard to see in the digital copy, but the actual photo is a little bit more clear. We'll have another one in just a few weeks, and Maggot should look like a proper little baby then!

Hooray for the NHS...

Never thought I'd say that again, given the incompetent bumbling that has been involved with my entire pregnancy to date. But two really good things happened this week with them.

The first was when I went to see my GP (Dr. Wellings, who has 0 personality and even less of a bed side manner). I needed a refill on my inhaler, and I asked him if that was still all there was for asthma treatment. Not any more, it's not. The NHS have discovered that some people's asthma is better managed with tablets (what do you know?) and he told me to see the asthma nurse about a trial of the new pills they have just started prescribing. I can't take them while I'm pregnant, but you'd better believe I'll be in the office the week after Maggot's born getting hooked up!

Also good was someone at the midwifes' office. I phoned up because they didn't give me a maternity exemption card (I am supposed to get free drugs while I'm preggers) and I needed to get my prescriptions filled. The midwife I talked to got my details, and then she said she'd bring the form I needed to take to my GP to the house. 20 minutes later, the form was pushed through my letter box. Someone actually went out of their way to help me!

It's funny, how your opinion of good service changes. When we first moved over here, I was constantly annoyed by people working in government offices, banks, etc. because I felt they were so unhelpful. I was used to people going above and beyond, and had come to expect it (and maybe even to demand it) of the the people I came in contact with. Now, every time someone is kind or extra helpful, it seems like a little gift. They are doing something that they don't have to, and I appreciate them so much more for doing it.

Living in this country really makes me appreciate the way I grew up. I know Americans have a bad reputation for being pushy and insincere (and let's not forget arrogant--always arrogant). And maybe I am biased. But I think Americans are GREAT! We are friendly, outgoing, confident, and warm. And if these traits are sometimes all a show? Who cares? People are still being nice to you, and at the end of the day, that's what really matters. I'd rather have insincere kindness than honest loathing.

Anyway, I'm done now. I just wanted to say Yay England, and include a big Hooray America!

Excitement…

Martin and I had a really nice weekend. He worked Saturday morning instead of all day Saturday, so we actually got to spend a little time together. And I went to a scrap booking party at Emma’s mum’s house, which was fun. Martin got 3 ½ hours on the X-Box out of the whole deal, so he was happy about it. We went for a lovely walk around the salt marshes on the waterside on Sunday morning, which was great. There’s a public footpath down there that’s lined with plum trees, and they are all blossoming at the minute (can’t wait for the plums in August). Then church, of course. We went to the Mundays’ house afterwards and I made fajitas and Mexican rice for dinner. We had an early night, which made it even nicer!

The really great thing about the weekend was baby related, though. I felt Maggot move (for sure) for the first time. Yesterday morning I was lying in bed trying to find the will to move, when the baby started doing it for me! I swear he was using my stomach for a trampoline. He was moving all over the place. It felt so strange, but wonderful. I woke Martin up to tell him, but he wasn’t that impressed—mostly because I woke him up at 7:30 on a Sunday morning. What do you know, there’s really a baby in there!

We also found out that our new neighbors, Simon and Joanne, are expecting a baby. I was pleased with that, because that means they won’t be upset with us over our screaming baby since they’ll have one of their own. And who knows—it might help us bond with them a little bit.

Growing and Glowing...

This weekend was a milestone in my pregnancy. For the first time I had someone randomly touch my growing pregnant bump. It actually happened twice. The first time it was just a pat, which was fine. The next time was a prolonged rub, and that kind of freaked me out. I’ve also had people that I haven’t told I’m pregnant asking me when the baby’s due. Either word travels quickly, or I am definitely starting to look pregnant!

I am really starting to feel great! This is more how I imagined pregnancy would be. I am always pretty tired, but I’m not exhausted all the time, like I was during my first trimester. And I still get sick occasionally, but it’s not constant any more. My skin is glowing, my belly is starting to get all round, and I feel like I’m glowing (most of the time, anyway). 4 months pregnant is really nice!

Cool stuff...

A few groovy things to report. Number one really groovy thing is that I think I felt Maggot move for the first time. I'm not quite sure, since it was a totally new sensation, but the other morning while I was laying in bed seriously considering getting up, I felt a strange sort of bump. I think it was him, but I can't be sure. I haven't felt anything since, until this afternoon. Now I am feeling little fluttery movements. I think this is it!

Second (and, I think, equally) groovy thing is that I had my first massage assessment last night and I passed it! I only have to have a total of three successful assessments, so one down, two to go! Emma's mum, Caroline, came in for the massage, and she was really happy with the treatment. She told me that she would come in any time I needed a client, and asked me if I was doing home visits yet. I told her that I was planning on it as soon as I was fully qualified, so I think I may have a client waiting for me when I finish.

I also told my massage instructor about my pregnancy. She had a mild freak-out (the first thing she said was, "I need to get you risk-assessed), told me I wasn't allowed to use surgical spirits to clean people's feet any more, and then congratulated me. She said that if anyone can't make their assessments, I can take them on. I am concerned that I won't finish my assessments before I am too pregnant to massage people any more.

Anyway, that's the groovy stuff. Will post more later!

On the phenomenon of “Lads Mags”

So I know that growing up in rural Utah is like being raised in a plastic bubble. You are completely cut off from mainstream popular culture. But I moved away at an early age; saw the world, experienced life, etc. I wouldn’t say that I was completely sheltered (despite my parents’ best efforts). I have come across something in England that shocked me at first, but now just disgusts me. It’s the infamous “Lad Mag.”

The “Lad Mag” is a semi-reputable publication, either a newspaper or a magazine, which caters to an audience of 16-35 year olds. The news is gossipy and fun—the literary equivalent of a Big Mac opposed to a 3 course sit down meal. The articles are mostly about various sports or the newest cars, and are generously broken up by pictures of half naked women.

The page three girl, a regular feature of the less reputable newspapers, is practically an institution over here. Remember the pop star Samantha Fox from the mid-80’s? She got her start as a page three girl. There are loads of quasi-celebrities over here that are famous for their appearances on page three of The Star, The Sport, or equally “classy” papers. These girls, like Zoe, 24, London, are famous just for taking their tops off and appearing nearly naked in a national newspaper. One paper even lets the girl show off how clever she is, by printing one of her comments on a little news snippet called “the news in briefs.” Clever play on words, but still disgusting, and the magazines are worse. Page after page of topless girls is briefly broken up by some stupid story about the latest antics of some football club’s manager. And where can one buy these magazines? Anywhere! They’re not even put on the top shelf so young children can’t reach them. They aren’t even covered up, like Cosmopolitan in most Utah grocery stores. You can walk into any supermarket and be greeted by a bevy of bare breasts.

You can almost forgive the “lads” who buy the magazines. I know the whole “boys will be boys” argument is a pathetic excuse, but it’s still socially acceptable. It’s all the married or otherwise attached men who buy them that really bother me. They sit in the cafeteria during their breaks and ogle the pictures of scantily clad young women, commenting lewdly on their bodies with no consideration for their female colleagues sitting next to them. They sit there with their pasty pale faces and sagging beer bellies critiquing the figures (never faces—funny, that) which would be the envy of most women. And then they go home to their wives or girlfriends, who will never look like the page three girl, and don’t even think twice about how degrading their actions at work are to the women they profess to love. People say that women set an unrealistic standard of beauty for themselves, but I think it’s mostly the men.

I think perhaps one of the worst things about this casual nudity is that it becomes normal after a while. Even the most sensitive person still reads the story on page two, seeing the picture of Zoe, 24, London, on page three but not really noticing it. And maybe that’s the worst part. These women are exposing their bodies to the world, and most of the world glances at them without really seeing them. This shocking display goes completely unnoticed, and that girl’s desperate bid for attention is, in the end, a waste of time.

A Solution—Sort Of…

A few days ago I got to talk to my lovely sister Angie. I hadn’t talked to her in ages, and it was so nice! Her daughter Haven sang me “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star” and I also spoke to Anya (the most beautiful child ever!!!).

In the course of the conversation, it came out that people over on t’other side of the pond are a little upset that Martin and I aren’t planning on finding out the sex of the baby. Not because they are dying to know or anything, but because they want to buy stuff for Maggot and can’t find anything cute that’s gender neutral. Here’s my solution.

Don’t buy us anything.

Just kidding! If you want to buy gifts for the newest grandchild, great grandchild, niece or nephew, feel free. We have virtually nothing for a baby, and I love getting packages in the mail. But we won’t really need much for the first few months because the baby’s only going to be eating, sleeping, crying, and pooping. All we need are little onesies and sleep suits, and we have bought the newborn ones that we need. Maggot will need church clothes, and that’s about it. What we WILL need are little outfits for 3-6 months or 6-9 months, so if anyone wants to buy gifts, just wait until after we’ve had the baby and know its sex. See—everybody’s happy, right?

So yeah, in pregnancy news, I’m feeling really good now! My morning (and mid-day, and evening, and middle of the night) sickness is virtually gone, and I am starting to get a bit of my energy back. Sometimes I actually manage to forget that I’m pregnant! The baby is definitely growing, because I am getting a little pregnant belly and I can sleep through the night without having to get up to use the bathroom. Hooray!

In Martin land, the job is going well. Valentine’s Day was a big success, and their business has really picked up since then. It would seem that diet season has officially ended, so he might start earning a bonus soon. He is working on the house like crazy, and our guest bedroom is nearly done. He’s got some cladding to put up on the wall, the door, radiator, and trim to paint, and the floor to do. Then we can start getting the furniture up there and move back to the front room. It’s really coming along.

In me news, things are pretty much the same as always. Work continues to be a chore to get to but a delight to stay (most days). I still really like all the people I work with, and most days I stay really busy. College is going well. I’ll start my assessments next week, and hopefully will be fully qualified shortly.

That’s the update.

I am starting to get a proper little pregnant “bump,” and it is really freaking me out!

OK, prepare for more neurotic ranting. With my ectopic pregnancy, I was convinced I was starting to “show” before I found out about the whole thing. Then I found out about the problems, and I felt right stupid for thinking I had a normal pregnancy. Now I know everything is normal. I have seen the baby—seen its heart beating, seen it moving. I have had my pregnancy confirmed by several different medical professionals. And yet part of me still feels this is not real, and that my growing belly isn’t me being pregnant. I really feel like I am just getting really fat.

Martin is really great about the whole thing. And I am actually losing a little weight through the bum, thighs, and midriff. I really am only gaining on my tummy. But it still feels fake. Like maybe I have wanted to be pregnant for so long that I have convinced myself I am but it’s all in my head.

On a very positive note, now that the baby is getting bigger (he’s about the size of a clenched fist right now), he’s lifting out of my pelvis. This means that my bladder has its own personal space back, and I can sleep through the night without getting up to use the toilet. Hooray! I am also sick a lot less, though it hasn’t gone away completely. I still have to be careful about what I eat and when I eat it, not let my stomach get empty, and avoid certain smells that really make me ill. Sleeping all night long is really making a huge difference!

Martin is still getting on well at work. Valentines Day was good for the restaurant, though not good for the two of us. We didn’t see each other all day. Martin was asleep when I left for work, then he was at work when I got home. I went to college, and then he came home for a brief break between lunch and dinner. I got home from college at about 9:30, and he didn’t get home until midnight. I woke up for a few minutes when he got into bed, but that was it. We’re going out to dinner tonight to celebrate instead. He is working the day shift instead of the evening.

College is going well. I am completely caught up in my course work and have passed off all of my exams. We have next week off for half term, and when we come back I start doing my assessments. I have to check with my instructor and see if I can do my assessments a little bit faster—before my pregnant belly starts getting in the way. If everything goes well, I should have my assessments done by around April or May. Then we hand in our portfolios in June, and have our little graduation ceremony. Once I have my certificate, I can start practicing. I’ll be 7 months pregnant at that point, so I probably won’t be able to do much right off, but I’ll have that qualification. I’m really excited about it.

We did some baby shopping last night, and picked up two little outfits to take the baby home from the hospital in. One for a girl, the other for a boy. We have pretty much decided we don’t want to find out the baby’s sex in advance. Martin had so much fun picking out the boy outfit, since he got to buy little miniatures of the clothes he wears, but he freaked out about the girl stuff. He denies it, but he really doesn’t want to have a little girl. The thought of it terrifies him, mostly because a girl would be so strange to him. He wouldn’t know what to do with her. If it is a girl, I’m sure he’ll figure it out soon enough. Anyway, we now have an adorable cream coloured dress and little cream coloured socks, or tiny denim shorts and a preppy little button down cotton shirt. Both outfits are absolutely adorable!

That’s the Gilbert family update. Sorry it’s mostly about me and Maggot. He’s really all I want to talk about right now.

One of the seals at Donna Nook. This one had lost most of it's fur, but we thought it was adorable all the same. Doesn't it look cuddly? It probably weighs as much as Martin!

The sun breaking through the clouds. An absolutely stunning view, and we suffered to get the photo. The wind was blowing so hard that it nearly took the car doors off!

Check out this grand-daddy cow! We passed through a bit of open pasture on our drive through the Yorkshire Dales and found ourselves completely surrounded by these guys. They're like no cows I've ever seen!

The Magical Work Ethic to the Rescue (Again)

Not for the first time in my life, today I am grateful for the work ethic that my wonderful parents began instilling in me from an early age.

Emma, the OTHER pregnant temp at work, got sacked yesterday. They said that it was because of a combination of performance and attendance. Personally, I think it was more attendance than anything else. She was pretty sick, just like me, but unlike me she called in sick a lot. I just toughed it out, threw up in the toilets at work, sucked on mint candy, and struggled on. And now, she is gone and I still have a job. I’m sad to see her go, but still—Hooray!

As each day passes, I feel a little bit better. But then, just when I think I’m in the clear, I have a really bad day. But I am just a few days shy of my second trimester, and I am thrilled about that! Another delightful pregnancy quirk that has just cropped up is insomnia. I get to sleep just fine, but then my bladder wakes me up at 3 am (seriously, you could set a clock by it!). I get up to use the bathroom, then I lie in bed awake for the next hour and a half. I finally start to get some good sleep again about an hour before my alarm goes off. It doesn’t matter how much I’ve had to drink, nor does it matter how tired I am before I go to bed. Fabulous. Jenny (at work) says it’s just my body preparing me for the sleeping habits of my baby. Thanks for that, Jen!

We are having another cold snap over here. It was -3C this morning. But the snowdrops are blooming, and the daffodils are just beginning to peek their heads above the ground. We should be awash in a field of yellow in the next 4 or 5 weeks. Spring is coming, and I am so excited. England in the spring is more beautiful than anything I’ve ever seen. I didn’t take many pictures last spring, but I promise to be much better this year. Seriously beautiful!!!

Clarification...

I do NOT know if I am having a boy or a girl. I don't even suspect it might be a boy. It is way too early for any of that. We are calling the baby "he" for simplicity's sake.

Also, we have nick-named the baby Maggot. Sorry to all of you who think that's a horrible name for a fetus. He looked like a maggot at my first ultrasound. Plus, he was making me miserable and I didn't like him very much at the time (though, of course, I love him!!). The name just kind of stuck, so that's what he'll be called for the time being. Don't worry though--he (or she) will have a proper name when he's born!

We went to my second ultrasound yesterday, and it was even more amazing than the first one!!!

So, first things first, despite my neurotic panic that something would go wrong, everything looks normal. The strange mass on my gestational sack is nearly gone. It is small enough to be considered within the ranges of "normal," and didn't even get mentioned in my paperwork. The baby is growing at a normal rate (he's 48mm long right now) and I was only one day off in my calculation of my due date. New date is August 19th.

I thought the first ultrasound was amazing, and it was, but this one was so incredible. Even though Maggot's only about 2 inches long, he really looks like a baby already! And he was moving around like crazy! I joked with the woman doing the scan that I wasn't sure if I was excited to feel that or not. The first time I saw him move I nearly cried. I really have a baby inside me!

Martin had a good time at the scan as well. He actually showed a little excitement (shocker)! I could tell he was happy because when he saw the baby move he got this amazed expression on his face and he said, "I made that!" He also said that the baby MUST be his, because it wouldn't stop jiffling around. The technician actually had a hard time getting measurements because Maggot wouldn't hold still. I was so relieved to see our little acrobat.

For the 30 minutes after the scan Martin and I walked around with big, dumb grins on our faces. When I got back to work everyone ooohed and ahhed over the picture, even though you can't see much. I am so happy right now!

I'm disgusted with myself right now. It's Friday night, and I am sitting at home alone watching (gasp) REALITY TV!

It could be worse, I guess. It's "So You Think You Can Dance," so at least they're actually doing something. But really, I couldn't find the remote and couldn't be bothered to change the channel. CSI is next.

Martin is working, and should be home in about 1 1/2 hours. For once I didn't come home and crash. I cleaned the bedroom and folded some laundry. I think the worst of the sickness and exhaustion are behind me, thank goodness. I have been up since 6:30 this morning, and I still feel human.

Martin's loving work! I went in for a few minutes tonight while I was going to the grocery store, and I got to watch him working for a little while. He fits right in, and looks like he's worked there for years. I may not like it that I'll be spending Fridays alone for the foreseeable future, but I like it that Martin loves his job.

Martin’s Job…

Martin’s first day at work was good, I think. For those of you who know him well, you know that he doesn’t really show excitement or anger or fear, or any emotion, really. He is so typically English and blasé about everything. When he got home last night he just looked really tired.

He said that the restaurant was pretty busy, and he worked a 10 hour day. But it was 10 hours spent doing things he likes to do, and I think that will make all the difference. Plus, he left the house at 8:45 am instead of 7:15 am and walked to work. I think that was probably the selling point! He is at work now, and I am curious to see how his day went today. Sally and Nadine, the owners of The Place, are taking him to lunch in York on Monday. He’s being wined and dined! They will be working with him all this week, and he will be on his own starting next week.

Work continues much the same for me. Every day sees me a little bit more comfortable with my duties and a little more confident in the work I am doing. The little office alliances are becoming clearer and the petty arguments seem more obvious. But everyone is still so lovely. Funnily enough, there are three of us that are pregnant at work. Kerrie is due on April 23, Emma is due on September 5, and I am due on August 20. I am the oldest one by about 7 years. Oh well, c’est la vie.

In pregnancy news, I think the worst of the morning sickness is past. Either that or I am learning to manage it better. I no longer spend all my time fighting nausea. I really only get sick if I let myself get too hungry, which has happened a lot this week. It seems like no matter how much I eat I am still starving. But I am being good and eating fruit, veggies, and yoghurt for my snacks. It seems like I don’t have enough meals in the day to get all the stuff that I need. Thank heaven for pre-natal vitamins!

It’s kind of funny that my eating habits have changed so much. I have actually lost about 8 kilos since I got pregnant because I have been really trying to get all the fruit and vegetables in. I eat like a pig, but it’s all healthy, good stuff. But even with the weight loss, my clothes are starting to get too tight. I’m at that really annoying stage where you can’t tell if I’m pregnant or if I just need to lay off the chocolate. The other day Martin told me I was starting to look a little bit pregnant. Then he got worried, and asked me if he was allowed to say that. I love my husband!

A GREAT weekend and wonderful news…

My birthday was smashing! Martin and I went to the temple on Friday and spent Saturday driving around the Yorkshire Dales. It was nasty weather, but a beautiful drive. I have some fab pictures to post when I get a chance. Thanks everyone for my lovely gifts. It really softens the blow of getting older.

So today marks a milestone that Martin and I have been waiting patiently for. Most of the family already knows, but today’s the big BLOG announcement. Martin and I are going to have a baby! I’m due in late August.

I am 10 weeks pregnant, and today marks the end of the embryonic phase. I officially have a fetus (although we have called it a baby from the beginning.)! We found out about it on the 15th of December, and I already had an ultrasound to make sure everything was normal. The ultrasound was on the 3rd of January, and it was the most amazing and emotional experience I’ve ever had. I was only 7 weeks then, so there wasn’t much to see, but the baby is in the right place, and we saw its heart beating. I have another ultrasound scheduled for next week, and then I will start seeing the midwife.

So yeah, I think I have a pretty good excuse for not posting more often. Every spare moment I have (and there aren’t many, believe me!) has been spent sleeping. I’ve been completely exhausted and sick since the day I conceived, but we are still so excited! Martin has been great—really taking good care of us. And he is working much harder on the house now so it is done when the baby is born.

Speaking of Martin and in non-baby news (Martin accuses me of only talking about the baby recently so I’ll try not to), his last day at Enterprise was last Wednesday. It’s been a little bit weird for him, but I think he’s happy about it. He starts at The Place tomorrow, and he seems cool about it. He’s pretty nervous though. We bought him some new black shirts for work since that’ll be his new uniform and he’s getting a haircut today. This should be interesting. I know he liked his new job this morning when I had to get up and get ready for work at 6:30 and he stayed in bed. I’m sure we’ll settle into a routine soon enough.

This week we are working on our first clients at college. We’re only doing a back massage, not a full-body massage, but I am a little bit nervous. The massage bit is fine, but I’m not quite sure how to do record cards, explain the treatment to a client, etc. My first client is Fran Anderson, Lewis’s mum. She’s excited for the massage, and I have given her a leg and abdominal massage before, so it shouldn’t be too bad. Next week is the first full body client, and Emma is coming in for me. That one is a little bit nerve wracking. But I got to practice the back massage on my college buddy Selina, and she liked it. Martin may be getting several massages this week. I’m sure he won’t complain!

Hello my faithful blog readers!

Sorry I haven't posted for so long. Life is so busy right now, and I haven't been feeling so hot. Basically, I do what I have to do every day, then immediately go to bed. If you are feeling neglected, you should see the state of my house. It is disgusting!

Things continue much the same as ever. Work is good for both of us. Martin's last day at Enterprise is next week, and he is getting pretty excited for that. He'll have a few days off (to get stuff done on the house hopefully) and then he'll start at "The Place." I am really starting to learn the ropes at Alan Dick and now have my own e-mail address, logon, and set of defined duties. Of course, I am not there today. I am having some problems with my asthma and have to go to college tonight as I am taking two tests. There was no way I could work all day and then do three hours of college. I hate being sick!

We went to Martin's work holiday party last weekend, which was pretty fun. It was in Sheffield, and we were late leaving. Martin drove like a maniac the whole way there, and we made it in record time. The dinner was great, the compan was pretty good, and watching everyone get falling down drunk was a real treat, as usual. I did get a fabulous new dress out of the whole deal, and was pleased to look classy AND covered up. There were some seriously skimpy outfits there. We didn't stay very long--only about 3 hours--but were glad we went all the same.

We are now on afternoon church, which is great! Sunday morning we went for a walk down at the Water's Edge Park. We took a loaf of stale bread and fed the ducks. It was really strange though, because along with the usual ducks and moorhens and swans, there was a flock of terns (kind of like seagulls, only different). We really had a good time feeding them, because they are super aggressive and got into fights over the bread. A few times they even snatched food right out of the other birds' mouths (think the "Mine" seagulls in Finding Nemo). It is kind of bad that it's dark by the time we get out of church, but that won't be the case for very much longer. Summer is coming--though not fast enough for my liking!

Anyway, I need to get some homework done and study for my tests, so I'd better close for now. I promise I will be better about posting--or I will at least try to be!