Sunset outside one of the small villages near Cartmel--my dream village!

The village square in Cartmel. Lovely, and so terribly English!

The stunning horizon across Windermere.

Martin on the ferry across Lake Windermere--good times!

I wrote something while I was at work, and thought I'd post it since it's already there.

On getting older…

Time seems to fly by regardless of how much you'd like to stop it. I remember being a little girl and thinking that I had all the time in the world to do all the things I wanted. I remember looking forward to my next birthday with impatience. I couldn't wait to be eight so I could be baptized and get my ears pierced. I couldn't wait to be twelve so I could stop going to Primary. I couldn't wait to be 16, because then I could drive and date. I wanted to be 18 so I could vote. I wanted to turn 21 so that I could go to Vegas with my friends. All of these ages that I wanted to pass so that I could do all these things that I thought were so great. The time seemed to pass so slowly, and I wondered if I'd ever reach these milestones.

Now, it's another story. With each day that passes I see lines being etched on my face. My skin is losing it's elasticity. My hair is gradually fading from chestnut brown to white. My eyes lose a little more of their innocence each day as I truly begin to realize the hard lessons of life--things don't always go as planned, people are not all basically good, sometimes the only constant in life is the injustice of it all. The daily cares of cleaning the house, going to work, cooking meals, sleeping, and rising to do it all again are slowly wearing away at me. Life is passing quickly in a series of uneventful days and too short nights.

But then I will see an unexpected rainbow, or hear a beautiful bird's song. I will look at my wonderful husband with fresh eyes and realize all over again why I fell in love with him. When these brief moments come, I realize that I would not give back one moment of my life. The years creep by and every day that passes means I am closer to the end. But every moment that passes gives me a new opportunity to just be--to take deep breaths of clean, fresh air. To notice the sun streaming through the clouds in bright beams of gold. With every year comes more of those moments of perfection. And with age comes a heightened ability to recognize them.

Yesterday was the big day...

Martin and I had our first appointment at Scunthorpe General Hospital yesterday. We met with Dr. Odukoya and one of his nurses for our first specialist consultation. Dr. Odukoya, though a walking stereotype of English doctors (read: not English at all--Asian with a really thick accent and an Asian nurse standing by to translate if you can't understand him), seems really competent and thorough. I don't have the greatest faith in the medical profession in England, but I'm happy with him.

Basically, it's more tests. I will have to go in to the hospital to have a pelvic ultrasound, an x-ray, and more blood work. Luckily, my cycle falls perfectly with the required blood tests and scans. I can have everything done this week. Dr. Odukoya also wants me to try to lose some more weight, and he will be seeing us again in eight weeks. I have eight short weeks to get a whole bunch of tests done and get my backside to the gym. I can do this!

The results of all the tests we did earlier were a little better than expected. My hormone levels actually seem to have balanced themselves out. Martin's results were basically the same, but he is being tested again to see if the results are consistent. There wasn't much of a change from the results we got two years ago. Dr. Odukoya seems confident though!

In other news, my birthday was fantastic! Martin and I took a trip to Preston and went to the temple. We stayed in the temple accomodation on Friday night, and after we finished on Saturday we drove up to the Lake District. I was absolutely blown away by the beauty of it. I haven't seen many places in England that are untouched and still naturally beautiful, but it is up there! I fell in love with one of the little villages near lake Windermere. It's called Cartmel, and it's so quaint and beautiful. It's a traditional little market village nestled into a little vale about 5 miles from the lake shore. The village square is tiny, with a pub and a shop and a post office. I'd guess there are maybe 300 people living there, and it's all forest and farms surrounding it. I'll try to post one of my pictures of it later today.

This birthday was a little bit depressing for me. Getting older aside, I wanted to be finished having kids by the time I hit 27. I've passed the deadline with no hope of meeting it, and I hate not getting things done on time. But the appointment at the hospital helped, and I guess you just have to think that getting older beats the alternative. Plus, Velecia will always be older than me and she's going to be 30 next year! I'm still grimly holding on to my 20's.

Thanks to everyone for the lovely gifts! I guess people really are reading my blog, because I got so much stuff that I've expressed a desire for. Grandma Lofley, your gift DID get here on time!

Anyway, I need to get on the road. Got that commute to work. Ugh--don't want to go to work today. I'll try to post a few pictures when I get home.

Cultural differences--especially pop culture...

I've been thinking about pop culture lately, as I get more and more sucked in to English culture and more alienated from American stuff. We went and watched "Brokeback Mountain" over the weekend, and I am watching the news this morning and found out that it won a Golden Globe award last night. It was just barely released over here--hasn't even had a chance to be seen by very many people. It takes a while for American cinema to hop the pond, and I know nothing about movies that have been released in the States.

That got me thinking about music (not too much of a jump between the two--right?), and how Britain really has it's own vibrant music scene that doesn't rely too heavily on the U.S. There are a whole bunch of bands that are HUGE right now over here, and I wonder if anyone in the States has even heard of them. I'd love responses to this post because I really want to know. Have you heard of the following bands or artists?

Sugababes
Arctic Monkeys
Nislopi
Shane Wall
KT Tunstal
Robbie Williams
Girls Aloud
Hard-fi
Pussycat Dolls
Razorlight


That's all I can think of right now--it's early for me and I don't really function well until I've been awake at least two hours.

I am kind of sad that I am losing touch with my American roots. I think I will come home to Utah and be strange there. I know I was last time, and I only lived here for 4 months before. I adjusted back to American life quickly last time though, and I think it might take longer the next time we move back. I guess you just get used to doing things a certain way. Habits can be hard to break.

In Martin news--he had his interview for the job in Nottingham yesterday. He should hear back on that by the end of next week. We could have another move in our near future--scary! But hopefuly this time we can get into a house that has central heating!

Anyway, must run. It takes me 25 minutes to get to work, so I need to get on the road. More later!

Martin and the missionaries--lookin' tough!

Two railway bridges converge over a canyon on the way to Chapel en le Firth in the Peak District.

Martin's mirror image. The picture only looks like it is the wrong way up!

Our computer is fixed--sort of!

We finally got our laptop up and running, which is a relief. We had to re-install windows so we lost all our pictures that were stored, but I am happy that we don't have to buy another copy of windows XP. We really can't afford that right now.

The sun finally came out today for the first time this year! The best part of it was that sunset wasn't until 4:19 pm. It had been setting at about 3:50, and that extra 30 minutes make all the difference. It was amazing how much better the day was when there was actually some daylight!

Martin and I had the missionaries over for dinner tonight. One of them, Elder Millar, is from the south of England. He has a very posh sounding accent and is very adorable. The other one, Elder Wilcox, is from Salt Lake City, Utah, and is also adorable. He's been on his mission for about 2 months now, and is really missing home. It was nice to have them over. Martin was home all day sick, so he cooked dinner. I came home to beef stew, and I made the dumplings. I especially enjoyed having a fellow American in the house, even though he did say geeky things like, "Oh my heck," and "gosh!"

I need to get going because Martin and I have big TV plans for the night. The season one finale of Lost is on tonight, and we have been looking forward to it all week. We are such nerds, but at least it's not celebrity Big Brother. That stupid reality show is on every night, and it's all that they talk about at work!

So much has happened--including our laptop having a system meltdown!

Just thought it might be nice to have an explanation for why I haven't posted in ages. Our laptop crashed last Friday and we are in the process of trying to get it fixed. Right now I'm at Cathy and Karl's house typing away in their computer room while they all watch telly downstairs.
First things first--Martin and I got our appointment to see the specialist at Scunthorpe general hospital for our fertility stuff. We are going to be seen on the 24th of January, so it is a great late birthday present for me. We got the letter on Wednesday last week, and I've been thrilled ever since.
Also a big thing, but not at all nice, our car was broken in to last Sunday. some little punks smashed in our rear window and stole, of all things, my scriptures! I hope that Bible and Book of Mormon really profit the little theives! I am really upset about it--those scriptures were a gift from my parents about 15 years ago, and they had all my favourite passages marked, as well as some really great glue-ins from Seminary and Institute. I guess getting new ones isn't a bad thing, but I loved those scriptures and am really feeling the loss.
When our laptop is fixed, I have some really great photos to post. Martin and I went up to the Peaks district (national park) on the Bank holiday Monday last week, and it is stunning! I cried like a baby on part of the drive because it felt so much like home. We drove to a town called Glossup, and then down to Chapel en le Firth. From there we went on to Castleton and into Bakewell, where we bought an authentic Bakewell tart (very delish!). Seriously, watch out for the photos. One of them is so good that we are going to have it printed up and framed to hang in our house. Of course, it's easy to take good photos when the landscape is so very picturesque! England always manages to take my breath away.
Other than that, things are pretty normal here. The days are starting to get longer, which is really a relief. It is now still light at 4 pm, but last week was so gray. On Friday it looked like the same time from 8 am until 4 pm because the clouds were so low and thick that the sun never managed to penetrate them. I wonder how much of my homesickness has been brought on by the depressing weather. I never miss Utah when the sun is shining and the sky is blue. That's something to think about.
Anyway, must go downstairs and be social. I just wanted to do a quick post for my faithful readers, because I don't want anyone to lose interest. I'll keep everyone posted on Martin's potential job in Nottingham and our fertility stuff., and hopefully I'll be able to post some more pictures really soon!