Monday, September 15, 2008

Calling all American parents...

I'm beginning to wonder if I am picking up weird British ways of raising Dylan.

As has been observed in the past, I am not exactly what you'd call a "natural mother." I was never that interested in babies as a child, and even LESS interested as a teenager and young adult. I only got interested when I decided to have children of my own, and even then...well, I'm not the most maternal person in the world. But what I lack in natural interest and ability, I make up for in effort.

I'm just worried that I am doing weird things now though, because I never really noticed the way things were done back home. All you American parent readers, could you please answer the following questions:

1) What age were your children when you stopped taking them places in a stroller and let them walk instead?

2) When did you try to wean them completely from either breastfeeding or a bottle? How old is too old to still be having a bedtime bottle?

3) Do you take your children to church in their stroller (people do it here, and I don't remember it being done back in the old home ward)?

4) What is your take on childrens' shoes? They cost around £30 over here and you take your kid to have them specially fitted. You are also advised to get them in shoes within a month or so of them starting to walk. What do the "experts" say over there?

5) At one year old, how much was your child eating? I worry that Dylan is over-fed. Also, when did you stop feeding them and let them exclusively feed themselves?

6) Do your kids watch a lot of television or movies? How much is too much?

Thanks everybody. I don't want to move back to Utah and be looked at like a parenting freak!

7 comments:

Greg, Ang & 4 kidlets said...

Here goes- just some of my opinions:)

1) What age were your children when you stopped taking them places in a stroller and let them walk instead? Mine are in the stroller going places until they refuse and always want to walk. It just makes life easier:) Usually at about 2 1/2-3 years they want out!

2) When did you try to wean them completely from either breastfeeding or a bottle? How old is too old to still be having a bedtime bottle? My girls stop breastfeeding between 9-11 months- they are just not interested anymore. Then I try to stop the bottle a couple months after they turn one. It doesn't have to be exactly when they are one like some people think:)

3) Do you take your children to church in their stroller (people do it here, and I don't remember it being done back in the old home ward)? Nope- in their carseat carriers though when they are tiny.

4) What is your take on childrens' shoes? They cost around £30 over here and you take your kid to have them specially fitted. You are also advised to get them in shoes within a month or so of them starting to walk. What do the "experts" say over there? I have heard it said that it is better for new walkers to be without shoes for a while because it helps strenghten the muscles in their feet- so usually only when you go out to church or out somewhere special at the beginning.

5) At one year old, how much was your child eating? I worry that Dylan is over-fed. Also, when did you stop feeding them and let them exclusively feed themselves? Pretty much as much as they want- they will let you know when they don't want anymore usually. It seems like they eat a ton, but they are also growing a ton. We let them feed themselves with utinsels when they are ready- not until a little over one year I think.

6) Do your kids watch a lot of television or movies? How much is too much? Nope- we try to limit it so they do other activities instead. Experts here say usually only one hour a day of "screen" time. We always go about 2 though- some in the morning and some in the afternoon. I feel like that's still O.K. because some kids are watching ALL day long:)

V said...

I think it sounds like you are doing just fine with Dylan. I'm far from a perfect mom, but here is what I have done with my kids.

#1- Strollers are nice to have when going to the mall or Lagoon or anywhere you know that you will be walking for a long time. Their little legs, as much as they want to, just can't keep up with our adult legs. I think I stopped using a stroller all together at about age 3. I still use my little umbrella stroller for Makenzie when we go to the mall. Nobody brings strollers to church here that I've seen. I think they don't, because it would be to big and bulky to pass in the halls or try to get by people when you change from class to class. Same with a carseat, gets in the way. You only have 7 more months tell Dylan can go to nursey, right. Yeahhh!!!!!

#2- My goal always was to breastfeed for one year. Trevin was 10 months, he lost interest and so did I. Tannon was 13 months. Makenzie was 11 months. All babies are different and It truly depends on how you feel and also if they are still interested in it. I did learn something about stopping though, don't stop cold turkey, it needs to be a gradual thing, cut down one feeding at a time per week until your down to one per day, to tell your body to stop making milk. You will be much less sore and Dylan will get use to it as well.

#3- Same as #1 Stroller talk

#4- Shoes cost anywhere from $10.00-to $25.00 for toddlers depending on what kind of quality you want. I don't think that people over here have their childrens shoes specially fitted, never heard of it here. I do agree with getting Dylan a pair of shoes so he gets used to walking in them.

#5- I feed my toddlers breakfast, lunch, and dinner with us and little snacks in between, like a small cup of applesauce or a peice of cheese with some crackers. If your wondering portion size, some where I heard that your child stomach is only about the size of their fist. I try not to over feed them and just give them toddler size amounts, check online to see how much a one year old should be eating. Also my kids gradually learned to feed them self between the ages of 12 months and 18 months, it takes alot of practice, and alot of patience. I'm still trying to get Makenzie to eat over her bowl so she doesn't get it all over.

#6- My kids were never interested in T.V. until about
2 1/2 or 3 years. Makenzie still won't sit down to watch T.V. and she will be 2. Makenzie will watch a few minutes and off she goes. As for my older kids they don't watch any T.v. during the week because they don't have time really. After school they have homework and chores and then they always want to play with friends. Saturday morning cartoons are a big hit here. If we are not doing anything as a family that is usually what you will find my kids doing. I read somewhere that kids should not get more than 2 hours per day screen time. I think that amount sounds good, it makes them do other things like excercise and also leaves their mind open to be creative.

Hope this helps, we all can't wait to see you guys.

Adriane said...

Here's how I've done it:
1-Mine are in a stroller only when I need to get something done quickly and I don't have the patience to wait for him or her (right now it's her) to wander around and look at every small thing that catches her interest. I do let her walk a lot now because she hates to be strapped into anything, especially the grocery cart.

2-I was never able to nurse my kids. With #1 I lasted 2 months, #2 I lasted 3 weeks and #3 I lasted 12 days. I just don't produce well. That being said, I basically took the bottles away the day that they turned 1 if not a bit before that. I guess it may sound mean, but I figured, why not, he/she can use a cup, the bottle isn't necessary. I never really did have a "bedtime bottle", in that I never put a kid to bed with a bottle. However, Ashlee still, at 22 months, really wants to have a drink fo milk before going to bed. She only gets 3 glasses of milk each day.

3-The only time I have taken a stroller into church was on the
2nd Sunday of the month when my ward has "linger longer", a potluck to fellowship with eachother. I would bring her stroller into the cultural hall so that she would have somewhere to eat and not wander around. P.S. Linger longer is done here because our ward is far flung, not like the close knit wards in UT.

4-I only put mine in shoes when I know that I am going to let her walk around where not having shoes might not be a good idea. She still goes to church without them and walks around outside without them. I like her to be wearing shoes if she's walking around in stores though. I only wear shoes when I have to so I take that same approach with my kids.

5-babies will only eat until they are full naturally until about 5 years of age. At that point they can be taught to overeat by adults making them finish what is on their plate and so on. If he is eating it is generally because he is hungry, so don't worry about it. He looks perfectly happy and healthy!

6-I admit that my kids probably watch way more tv than they should, but I am getting better at having the tv off more.

There's my side of it all. Hope it's helpful. I hope that I can someday come to visit you when you are back in Utah. Might be tough though since I'm in Texas.

Amberlynn said...

1) We still have a little umbrella stroller for Jasper, but often forget about it. When we do have it, he often prefers to push it rather than be pushed.

2) I live in Oregon, with has the highest percentages of breastfeeding for the longest amount of time. "Breast is best" they say. I breastfed Jazz (though not exclusively) all the way up until I was too pregnant with no. 2 to be able to stand it. I may wean this one earlier, though, as I'm not a fan of "Breastfeeding Brain."

3) I do not take my children to church.

4) Shoes: since I prefer barefoot whenever possible, that's sort of what we do. In sliver territory, we go for hand-me-downs, sandals, or the Crock-knock-offs my son convinced me to get him. ($15!!! That's a lot for my budget.)

5) I still help Jasper with the last spoonfuls of his cereal, but other than that, he was feeding himself whatever amount he wanted since he could.

6) WE watch movies occasionally, and Jasper watches with us until he falls asleep. And thankfully, we don't own a TV. He does get some computer time, but mostly play or reading suits him.

*I think children are raised different from household to household. IMHO, You should do what works for YOU, and what you think is right, regardless of what "experts" tell you.

Unknown said...

1-I would use a stoller as long as he lets you (that is if he stays in it) I still use one and my baby is 3. The down side to them walking by them self is you really half to watch them becasue thyre basicly. In a stolloer you still have some restrant on them but if he is climbing out of it i wouldnt use it any more unless you want to put your bags and stuff in it if not its just one more thing to take care of
2- THe day my children turned one they were mommy and bottle free ( boy that sounds mean) I just let them no longer breast feed. the day the turned one they got a tippy cup AND they went to whole milk. Depending on whether he is eating solids or baby food, I would do baby food for the three meals and cerial for an evening snack which would help him sleep at night. and if he get hungry in bettween try a half of pb and j or some fruit. For breakfast you could do bannas slices and dry creial and let him feed himself. I would give him solids if he requests it. But By the the age of 2 he sholuld be on solids completely. My kids got what we got but only a smaller plate and helpings. If he is waking up for a feeding at night its not becasue hes hungry (it out of habit) I had a hard time believing that too when a doctor told me that she said children dont get hungrey at not and that they were just thirsty and i thought she was crazy but i tried it and she was right. I would just give them a drink from a sippy cup as much as they wanted and it worked and she was right. WEiRD huh!!
3-I never did this becasue there was no room. It really up to you if you want to--its just one more thing you have to take care of
4-Now it weird over there. Shoes are good becasue they help form their feet. ANd they look cute too. The downside to shoes is they loose easily. If he is stating to walk and tring i would do them so he can get used to them.
5-I honesltly dont thing you could over feed a baby. they so actually and what not. Use your mommy sesce if you think he has had enough then he probeley has and if he is still acting hungrey give him alittle more. Unless he is eat a hole lot like eating you out of house and home i wouldnt worry about it.
6- I hate to say this and you can slap me when you get here but tv is a good babysitter IF you are close by. I would contain it somewhat. I alwayed used the educational kids shows and i was surprised by what they learned. Some people say no tv but i dont it hurts anything. Now when there older thats a differant story.

--Jamie just remember to use your good sence. I offen refer to it as the mommy voice in me. Youre doing great JUST WAIT UNTIL #2 GET HERE.:)

Anonymous said...

Lol, "weird British way"??? I knew the pro-British Jamie couldn't last long he he he :)
You are a very good Mom/Mum, Dylan is a good boy, in a good routine, and the main thing is he is a very happy little boy - STOP WORRYING!!!

I'm off to strap my children into their strollers so they can watch TV all day, but it's ok because their shoes cost £40 (note the British sarcasm)
Emma
xx

Anonymous said...

AAAAAARRRRGGGGHHHHH, just realised I used the word "stroller" - what have you done to me Jamie!!!